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A life of continual crime

Illustrated

Joost Nillissen • Boek • paperback

  • Samenvatting
    In this outrageous roller-coaster story Joost Nillisssen recounts the hilarious adventures of his alter ego Mr Yosht, presented here as an elderly gentleman and a Dylanologist of some repute, who inexplicably finds himself forced into a life of continual crime for which he turns out to be ill equipped.
    In sixty-nine short stories and drawings Mr Yosht encounters some unsavoury characters such as the one-eyed undertaker, Tiny Giant and Clean Mary. Others will become his friends and save his life, the indomitable, filthy rich, retired classics professor Pierre Hubnoth who translates Aeschylus while wearing woman's clothes, and his friend the Dominican monk who likes to read Keats and quote Dante.

    After the unfortunate death of Tony the Limp, Yosht has to run, not only from the police, but most of all from the revenge of the Limp's widow, Granny O'Malley, who has sworn: 'I will find you and kill you'.

    Yosht ends up in a remote and deserted Andalusian village where in the end all the friends are reunited. It is decided to make the village their new home. Plans for the future include a golf course, a hotel and a roundabout nobody is enthusiastic about.

    Just when things were looking up for Yosht, Granny O'Malley comes knocking on his door...
  • Productinformatie
    Binding : Paperback
    Distributievorm : Boek (print, druk)
    Formaat : 200mm x 200mm
    Aantal pagina's : 250
    Uitgeverij : Uitgeverij Terebint
    ISBN : 9789081803687
    Datum publicatie : 08-2020
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Fragment

His very large hands stroked an alert little dachshund sitting on his lap. It was an eerie scene, but the one thing that struck me most was the clarity of Mr Schulz’s sole blue eye, the other being covered by an eye patch. The tiny giant next to me bowed deeply, indicating that I should do the same. I refused. The boss smiled.
‘Do you want to make a deal?’ he asked. ‘Would you like to make a few pfennig?’ The one-eyed undertaker, I suddenly realized, was of German descent.
‘Who wouldn’t?’ I replied.
‘You would have to start at the bottom,’ warned Schulz.
‘Makes sense.’
‘I’ll start you off as a courier for FNO-ETA.’
‘What does it mean?’ I asked, ‘FNO-ETA?’
‘Fear No One – Except Tony Awkward’
‘Who the fuck is Tony Awkward?’
‘Someone to be feared, although, if truth be told, I fear his wife even more.’
‘His wife?’
‘Grace O’Malley. She’s Irish.’ Siegfried Schultz raised his hands as if no further explanation was required. ‘What do you say? ‘I’ll start you off at two-hundred-and-fifty a week.’
‘You won’t be disappointed,’ I promised him.
‘Of course I won’t be disappointed,’ Schulz snarled, ‘you wouldn’t survive.’
I felt shivers running up and down my spine when I noticed that Schulz could simultaneously smile, snarl and blink his clear blue eye faster than the wings of a hummingbird.
‘Go see Giant in the next room. He’ll tell you what to do.’
Thus I was dismissed and forced into a life of continual crime. ×
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